Five Minute Friday — Good Bye

Around here we write for five minutes flat on Fridays.
We set a timer, throw caution to the winds and try to remember what it was like to just write without worrying if it’s just right or not.
I’ve said a lot of good byes this year. Some of them were with the hope that we would see each other again, some were good byes until eternity and some were painful good byes because choices had to be made.
This past year we said good bye to Kerry’s grandmother Stella over Thanksgiving break. We celebrated her home-going and while the good bye was sad because we will miss her, it was joyous to think of her rejoicing in Heaven.
Little did we know that week while we were visiting is likely when our son Knox died. Within a week of returning home from saying good bye to Grandma, we said good bye to our precious son Knox. That has, for me, been the hardest good bye of my life. There were, and still are, so many unknowns, fears and unanswered questions yet. When I think back to the month or so that followed, the only thing that comes to mind is “numb”. I don’t remember feeling anything but immense sorrow and numb. Kerry’s birthday, Christmas and the New Year were all over shadowed by that good bye and that loss. We still don’t understand it, but we have found peace, we continue to trust our God for the healing only He can provide. And slowly, we come to terms with our good bye said too soon.
I’ve said good bye in a sense to some family involuntarily. They are good byes that are still very raw and painful. I have yet to reconcile it. They are good byes that had to happen because we are all accountable for our choices.
And yet other good byes have been bitter sweet. In quitting my job this semester, I have said good bye to a certain time of my life. I have enjoyed teaching students, I have delighted in seeing them learn and be successful. At the same time though, I am anxious to be home with our boys full time and to teach them, disciple them and be home here. I’m thrilled at the prospect, but I think too I will miss some parts of teaching. Others…I will not.
Good bye can mean so many different things. It can mean a closure to a relationship, but at the same time it can mean so many new opportunities. Good bye closes doors and opens them. It breaks hearts and heals them. It writes stories upon our hearts.
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2 thoughts on “Five Minute Friday — Good Bye”

  1. Visiting from 5MF…Truly sorry to hear about the loss of Knox and Stella…praying that God will continue to comfort you and your family through this time of grief.

  2. Wow! You’ve been slammed with some grievous events. I’m so sorry. One death is hard enough. I’m glad you’ve also had some really positive things and the promise of more.

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